RAPUNZEL: Believe it or not, this is a love story. We should probably back up to the beginning and our dreamy, romantic lead. (sniffs) Um something's up with Hook Foot. He hasn't moved in I don't know how long. I'm guessing since low tide. RAPUNZEL: Turns out, all of us had noticed Hook Foot acting strangely (grunting) Hmm (toenail tings) Ew! (claws clicking) (chortles) (raspy scraping) (groans) (raspy scraping continuing) (shrieks) Now I know why there's grease on my mirror handle. Now I know why my walnut-cracking stick smells like teeth. Maybe he's just in a good mood? That's the problem. Hook Foot only has two moods: surly and just the one mood actually. RAPUNZEL: Since Eugene knew Hook Foot best, he volunteered to question him with his characteristic tact and diplomacy. What is wrong with you? You're acting strange, and what is that weird thing you're doing with your mouth? - Smiling. - Oh! That's how you smile. And a And a a beautiful smile it is. I met someone, Eugene. Okay, always nice to meet people. No. A lady. Half of us are. No. A lady lady. You know You? Wow! Oh! Keep your voice down. I don't want the others to know. Foot, my man, you have my word. And believe me, I'm a vault. (gasps) Hook Foot met someone? HOOK FOOT: Hey! Yeah. I'm still really struggling with the whole "this guy's a vault" thing. BOTH: Hook Foot met somebody? - Aw, Hook Foot! - That's great, buddy! - I'm so happy for you! - Couldn't happen to a nicer guy. Is she pretty? Oh, what's her name? What does she look like? - I am just so happy for you. - Ooh, and he's surly again. Guys, he's back to normal! Tell us how you met her, Hook Foot. We want all the details. All right, fine. I was collectin' firewood the other day (grunting) Huh? - FEMALE: That's sea glass, hon. - (gasps) Fun fact: they're rarer than pearls. Heya, Butterfingers. Name's Seraphina. Oh, uh, this isn't butter, it's crab grease. I'm I'm Hook Foot. Ya don't say. Why do they call ya that? I have a hook for a foot. (laughs) You got more looks than brains, honey. (chuckles) Brains. RAPUNZEL: Okay, so it wasn't the most romantic story I ever heard, but Hook Foot was happy and that's all that matters. She gave me this to remember her by and told me not to lose it. ALL: Aw! (sighs) And I never will. We're even gonna do dinner later. Hookie! You got a date! No, it's not a date. We're just gettin' together to eat and, you know, uh, talk, and, uh Wait! I have a date! I think he's just a little anxious, that's all. He He's gonna be fine. RAPUNZEL: Uh, Hook Foot? (body thudding) You wanna grab a pulse? RAPUNZEL: Hook Foot had never been on a date before, so Eugene and I promised to help. Our first step: recon. We had to meet this special lad to see who we were dealing with Uh, um, oh, uh, there she is. Hey, hey, hey, hey, relax. You're in great hands here, Foot, okay? I am the dating master. Former (chuckles) Former dating master. But I can still give you some pointers about love. Hook Foot doesn't need pointers. He just needs to speak from the heart. Oh, no, no, no. It's not about speaking from the heart, Blondie. It's about the charm. (belch bellowing) Ugh, I thought that crawfish smelled bad goin' in! (chuckles) Who am I kiddin'? I'm gross! Don't worry, Hookie. When I'm done with you, you're gonna be a smooth-talking - (squeaking): She's a - Seraphina's a mermaid? Yeah, so? You're a woman with 70 feet of hair. And you don't see me staring. Yeah, you got me there. Lookin' forward to our date, honey. (giggles) See ya tonight! Apprehend Seraphina. The rest are disposable. RAPUNZEL: So, Hook Foot was in love, and he had his own way of showing it. I'm so nervous my ears are sweatin'! Anybody got a rag? Hey, hey, can I use your horse tail? (grunting) I guess that's a nay. You know, Foot, after describing her eyes, her chin, even the birthmark on her chin, you'd think at some point, you'd get around to mentioning that's she's half fish! I don't care if she's half fish! She's got a heart and I got a heart! And my heart, it burns! Sometimes it's 'cause I eat too fast. But also, it burns with loneliness. Seraphina's the only person I ever knew who could put out my burning heart and warm it up at the same time. (sighs) How romantic. Okay, fine. I'll swim with the current. Hook Foot, let's get you ready for a date. (thunder rumbling) First, we gotta get you the right look. Let's try this one that I like to call "the simmer. " (growling) (whinnies) - (growling) - (footfalls thudding) Let's not worry about simmering. All you have to do is be yourself. Just say whatever comes naturally. Huh how can my armpits be so clammy and yet so itchy at the same time? That's new. I wonder if I should have that checked out. Straighten that back. Sit however you want. You gotta put your best foot forward and in this case, I'm gonna let you decide which one that is. The important thing is that you're comfortable. Hmm? (grunting) EUGENE: Comfort's got nothing to do with it. It's about igniting the fires of passion. And that won't happen if sparks aren't flying, you know. What does that even mean? Trust me, Blondie, I've gone on tons of dates! - You have? - With you! - Oh, uh-huh. - And I know how love works. RAPUNZEL: Okay, so Eugene and I were at a bit of an impasse. Still, we were both excited when the big moment arrived. (playing romantic melody) Sorry about all the ear sweat. Bonjour, bienvenue, and welcome, I'm Eugene. I'll be taking care of you. Our first course, fresh halibut. (gasps) Steve! (string twangs) And I'm sure Steve is gonna pull right through. Ya know what? I'll serve myself. Kelp? Mm-mm, mm. Hmm (groans) You know what food you might like? Try the simmer. I hear it's wonderful. (growling) Why is your face doin' that? Is the kelp not sittin' right? Just say whatever comes naturally to your mind Uh, look at this weather, huh? Boy, is it weather! I see you still have the necklace I gave you. Do you you want it back? No, I'm just lookin'. Hey, I got you somethin', little gift. Sea glass, almost as rare as pearls. Those are called mermaid tears. You know where those come from, right? They come from mermaids, when we cry. (clinking) (quietly): Straighten your back. Sit however you want You gotta look good Be yourself Love is hard work It doesn't need to be (fast flamenco music playing) (string twangs) Uh, hope you enjoyed that little ditty. We call it, "Speak from Your Heart. " Look, I'm just gonna be honest. This ain't me. I'm trying so hard to impress you because I think you're really, really special, and and I'm not. I ain't a looker, I got a hook foot, I got bad breath I like your breath! Reminds me of seaweed drying in the morning sun. Hey, you still hungry? (chuckles) (grunts) (groans) Here! Seconds. Now you're talkin' my language, handsome. The moonlight on the shore The promise of much more It drives me crazy merely thinking of you But I'd give anything To hear you sweetly sing Those three small words I long to hear (piercing screech) (screech continuing) (whimpering) You pierce my ears and skull like you pierce my heart. Seraphina I think I love you. Hook Foot, I need to tell you something. (growls) Seraphina! Your time here is up! Hook Foot! Seraphina! - Jump! - Here ya go! (growls) (grunts) Run! (screaming) After them! (screaming) (screams, grunts) Come on! Let's scram! (growls) (growls) Now this is my kind of date! (yells) (thunder crashing) Don't worry. No matter what it takes, I'll protect you from the bad guys. That's the thing, Hook Foot. They're not the bad guys. I am. (thunder crashes) (thunder crashing) (growling) (grunting) RAPUNZEL: So this is where we came in before. Okay, we have to give Hook Foot and Seraphina time to escape! We had half-fish people, now we have full-fish people! What kind of anthropomorphic game are you playing? We are vodniks, and we enforce the laws of the sea! - (growls) - Oh, boy. (growls) - I have you now. - (chuckles) Yeah, well you brought forks to a knife fight. Vodniks, step away! (screaming) That's not how knife fights work! You are under arrest for abetting Seraphina, wanted thief of the deep! Thief? (thunder crashes) Wait, you're the bad guy? I don't get it. This is the sacred Mariner's Pearl. Where I come from, this thing is priceless. Insanely fragile, but priceless. Wait! You gave me the shell just to conceal stolen merch? - You used me! - It's not like that! Or at least, it's not anymore. When we first met, my play was to let you hang on to the pearl to keep my hands clean. I had to lose those vodniks. But then I fell for you. Hard. I fell for your good looks, your ear sweat, your crab-greased hands. (thunder crashes) (sighs) Seraphina. You gotta straighten out your life. It's too late for me. Maybe not for us. What if we escaped together? - But my friends - Would want you to be happy. Wouldn't they? Mmm WATER GOBLIN: They're in the cove! All right! I'm comin' with you. And you're comin' with me! (gasps) (screaming) (grunts) (grunting) SERAPHINA: No! Whew! Almost lost our new life. We've got to get outta this thing! It's no use! It won't break! None of us can get out! Hey! When did you get all this hair? WATER GOBLIN: Give up the pearl and surrender, Seraphina. And maybe we'll let you live. But not your dry-skinned land eel. Dry skin! Why, I oughta He goes, I go! Suits us. (gasps) (laughing) Shorty, how did you get out? Uh, I dug a hole lookin' for my walnut. Hole? I didn't see any hole down here (shouting) (grunting) Found it! (birds screeching) Seraphina! Your song! Not really feeling musical at the moment! - (growling) - Sing it now! (piercing screech) (screech continuing) Huh? (screaming) Hold my hand! Tight! (grunts) (screaming) (grunts) Hook Foot! (growls) Arrest them! Not so fast! Those are our friends! You (growls) irritate me. Yeah, right back at ya. It'll take more than a round, black paddle to defeat us! It's a frying pan. Aah! Yah! (laughs) Eugene! Duck! Whoa! (Water Goblin laughing) Yah yah! Hiyah! Oh, I broke your jail. Now what are you gonna do about it? (laughs) Oops. You did that on purpose. (grunts) - Huh? - (laughs) Stay here! I gotta help my friends! (grunts) (grunts, groans) Hook Foot! - (growls) - (grunting) SERAPHINA: Stop! You want it? What are you doing? I'll go in peace, if you leave Hook Foot and his friends alone. Or else goodbye pearl. (whimpers) No. Not the pearl. As you wish. - (grunts) - (growls) I don't want you to go. Sorry, sugar, but I gotta. - (grunting) - (hook pops) Here, somethin' to remember me by. Giving a hook to a fish, really? Kidding. I love it. Seraphina! Seraphina! Bye, good-lookin'. (water splashing) Well, I'm sorry about how things worked out. Thanks. I guess I learned that sometimes you gotta let the one you love swim away. Mermaid tears. You know, Blondie, I can see what you were saying. Sometimes, love just finds a way of happening all on its own. And I guess sometimes you do have to work at it. RAPUNZEL: Either way, love can be hard. So when you find that special someone treasure every moment. (theme music playing) Now I got my eyes open and wide My heart burnin' like fire Feels like I'm so alive I'm never goin' back Whatever I want now, I'm gonna chase Who I am, I can't contain it I'm not gonna hold it in 'Cause there's more of me to give Oh yeah There's more of me to give
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