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Review

Eugene Fitzherbert (over a title-card reading Disney's Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure): Previously, on Tangled...

(Over a series of scenes from Season One):

Rapunzel: Have you ever seen anything so beautiful? … We'll get out there soon. … I just wish my dad would let me get out and see the real world.

Cassandra: This is where they found the miracle flower that saved your mom.

Rapunzel (indicating the Black Rocks): What are they?

Cassandra: Don't know.

Rapunzel: They're unbreakable!

King Frederic: You touched a… mysterious rock that somehow caused your hair to return?

Eugene: We once tried to double-cross this guy called "The Baron"; he hasn't stopped hunting us since!

Lance: Of course it didn't help matters that Eugene stole his prized Stalyan.

Varian: Those black rocks are actually some kind of— of ancient darkness.

Rapunzel: These rocks hold some kind of secret, and somehow… I'm connected with it.

King Frederic: I can see now that they're pointing in a direction… pointing you in a direction.

Rapunzel: It's like the rocks want us to… follow them.

Scene 1. The Dark Kingdom.

[Caption]: 25 Years Ago

(In a chamber of the castle in the Dark Kingdom, King Edmund is pacing back and forth, addressing Quirin and Adira.)


King Edmund: I can't stand this anymore. This stone has destroyed too many lives! — It stops today! (He rushes toward the Moon Stone, brandishing a sword. He grunts as he strikes the cage containing the Moon Stone.) Uhhhnnnn! Aaannnnghhh! Ngh! (His sword shatters; he flings it away in disgust.) Ugh! (He tries to crush the cage with his hands.) Agh! (Quirin and Adira hasten up to restrain him. He continues to groan throughout Quirin's speech.)

Quirin (seizing King Edmund, pleadingly): Your Majesty, please! You're not thinking clearly. You know the stone cannot be destroyed!

(King Edmund throws him off angrily, and strains to reach inside the cage to grasp the Moon Stone. An explosion of light issues from it, flinging all three to the ground and causing part of the castle to crumble.)

Quirin (as he and Adira begin to stir): Uhhh… (They see the king lying prostrate on the floor.) Your Majesty! (They rush to aid him, and shove aside the fallen pieces of masonry. He coughs and stirs.)

King Edmund (shaking his head regretfully): Ah, I was a fool. It cannot be stopped. Our only hope is to keep its power from the world.

Adira: But, Your Majesty—

King Edmund: At any cost! You — must — leave — this castle. Keep any from finding it. Anyone who seeks out this opal — Must — Be — Stopped.


Scene 2. On the road from Corona.

[Caption]: Present Day

(A large wooden caravan is being pulled by Maximus and Fidella, as Cassandra holds the reins. A door opens on the side of the caravan, and Rapunzel jumps out, happily.)

Rapunzel (sung): I wanna break every rule and cross every line. (spoken) Woo-hoooo!
(sung) I wanna show all the stars how stars oughta shine.
I wanna do as I please, and knock the world to its knees,
And go wherever the breeze is blowin'.

Next stop, anywhere!
Got a whole lot of world to see.
Nothing's stoppin' me.
Next stop, anywhere!
'Cause there's so much waitin'!
I know it's waitin'!
I feel it waitin' out there
Everywhere.


Eugene (spoken): Ha, Blondie! Wait up! (panting) Uhnn! Huh! Whoah, man, do you have any idea how hard it is keepin' up with you out here?

Rapunzel: Come on, Eugene! It's my first trip outside of Corona; it's like a whole new chapter of our lives has just begun!

Eugene: Well, that's kind of what I was thinkin', too.

Rapunzel: I mean, aren't you excited to see where these rocks are taking us?

Eugene: Well, ah, let's see. Excited? To follow a bunch of creepy rocks (sticking his fingers on the sharp point of a Black Rock) — ah! — to who knows where? (Rapunzel sighs in amused protest.) Of course, I'm excited. I'm with you! What else could I be?

Eugene (sung): We're gonna toss out the maps and follow the sun. (As Rapunzel pulls him over the edge of a waterfall, he yells, "WhoooooooAAAAAAAHHHH!")

Rapunzel: We're gonna blaze our own path and go on the run.

Eugene: We're gonna get out and do what nobody's done.

Rapunzel: There's so much out there to do, we've barely begun.

Eugene: We're gonna take every dare…

Both: And feel the wind in our hair,
With no one tellin' us where we're goin'.

Next stop, anywhere!
If you're there, I'm gonna be where I wanna be.
Next stop, anywhere,
And the world is callin'!
It keeps on callin'!
Just think of all that we'll share
Everywhere.


Cassandra (spoken): Rapunzel! … Do me a favor, and try not to run off like that. Not that I don't think you can handle yourself, but I promised your dad I'd keep you safe, and I'd hate to lose you less than a week on the road.

Rapunzel: Has it been that long already?

Cassandra: You've got to exercise at least some caution out here. Trust me, Raps, the real world isn't all fun and games.

Hook Foot: Next stop – Vaaaaaardaros!

Lance Strongbow: City of fun and games! Ha ha ha!

Cassandra: I am so glad we decided to bring those two along.

Eugene: Aaaaaah, come on, Cass! Vardaros is an amazing city; you're gonna have fun … which I'm guessing is a new thing for you.

Rapunzel: Come on, Pascal! It's our first big city outside of Corona. You heard 'em, Cass: this – is gonna be fun!

Cassandra (sung, as she runs through a herd of galloping horses, and Owl swoops down, hooting): Next stop, anywhere!
Got a feeling things'll be happ'nin' suddenly.

Rapunzel: Next stop, anywhere!
Gonna chase my destiny, find the best in me!

Eugene: Next stop, anywhere!
'Cause it's time we went to be where we're meant to be.

All: Next stop, anywhere!

Cassandra: And the world is waitin'…

Eugene: I feel it waitin'…

Rapunzel: It's all just waitin' out there…

All: Everywhere!
Everywhere!
Everywhere!


Rapunzel: Vardaros, here we come!

Cassandra: Not that you shouldn't trust the endorsement of three lifetime criminals, Raps – but maybe you should trust me, too. I just wanna make sure that we're not losing sight of what we're doing out here.

Rapunzel: I know. Believe me, Cass, I want answers more than anyone. I feel like whatever's waiting for us at the end of this road is only part of why we're out here.

(As the caravan lumbers forward, Adira is seen to be watching from a cliff, unbeknownst to them.)

Scene 3. Inside the caravan.

Eugene (opening a box containing a diamond ring): All right, boys, we're gonna try this proposal thing one more time, and where better than Vardaros — one of the most beautiful cities in the world?! It's perfect!

Lance (cheerfully): Didn't she say "No" the first time you proposed? (Eugene's face falls; he looks at Lance in pained disbelief.) I-I-I'm just sayin', you probably thought that would be perfect, too.

Eugene (now obviously irritated, clapping the box to): Thank you — Lance.

Hook Foot (satirically): It makes perfect sense to me: the princess is out in the free world for the first time in her life — I'm sure she's just itchin' to settle down with you.

(Eugene glares at both of them, distinctly displeased. There is a rumble and a jerk.)

Cassandra (from outside): We're here.

Lance (flinging open the door, and rushing out with Hook Foot, past Rapunzel, who is just about to enter): Woo-hoo! Guess I'm gonna find a picnic spot!

Hook Foot (his voice receding as he races Lance): No way! You got to choose last time, and there were ants all over the place…

Eugene (from within, trying to work up resolution): Come on, Fitzherbert! Forget Hook Foot. Forget Lance! (Rapunzel pauses at the door; Eugene addresses himself in the mirror.) This is Rapunzel we're talking about; of course she wants to get married — and, besides, I'm not asking her to settle down and throw her life away, I'm just asking her to (realizing, deflated) settle down— Oh, okay, (irritated, trying to pump himself back up) enough already, you just have to ask her flat out. (kneeling, as Rapunzel, outside the door, presses her ear against it) "Rapunzel, will you m—"

(The door creaks and flies open, as Rapunzel falls inside with a startled cry.)

Rapunzel: Aaa!

(Rapunzel half-rises; both look at each other blankly. Rapunzel notices the open box with the ring in Eugene's hand — he quickly claps it to behind him and grins guiltily.)

[Commercial break.]

Scene 4. Outside the caravan.

(Cassandra is stroking Fidella's nose; Fidella grunts and nickers. A low sound comes from behind.)

A Low Voice: Mrrrhhhh.

(Fidella and Cassandra start, and Fidella grunts nervously. As Cassandra heads toward the rear of the caravan, low grunts continue; Fidella looks around, nickering anxiously. A low growling and rattling come from a small door on the back of the caravan, and Cassandra draws her sword with a soft metallic shirr. With the point, she pushes the door open.)

Scene 5. Inside the caravan.

Rapunzel (rising): Eugene… did you just ask me to marry you?

Eugene: Wha-hat?! Ha-ha. No. That's… craz— no, I jus— I dropped something, and — and I got it, that, that something that I dropped, that I knelt down, and I picked it up, which would explain why I was on one knee… I could see how you would, uhhhh— (clearing his throat) hh-mmmm,you know…

Rapunzel: I thought I heard you say, "Marry me…"

Eugene: Ohhhhhh, I see, now there's the confusion, because I didn't say, "Marry me," I said … "Laramie" … b— I was talking about my old dog Laramie…

Rapunzel: You were talking about your old dog Laramie… to yourself?

Eugene (rapidly): Yup, good ol' scruffy, totally real, and totally not made-up Laramie.

(A hideous squalling squeal is heard from outside.)

The Squalling Squeal: YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Scene 6. Outside the caravan.

(Hook Foot, Lance, Rapunzel with her frying pan, and Eugene rush to the side of the caravan, assuming offensive postures.)

Rapunzel: C-Cass, Cass — are you okay? We heard a scream.

Cassandra (disgustedly): That wasn't me. (She turns, and reveals that she is holding, at arm's length, Shorty.)

Shorty (now revealed to have been both the Low Voice and the Squalling Squeal, as the others wince and plug their ears): YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Uhn.

(Cassandra lets him drop with a dull thud.)

Rapunzel: Shorty?

Eugene: Howdju get here?

Shorty (in his usual dazed and vacant manner, while dusting off the seat of his tunic): How indeed? The circumstances which led to my unexpected departure from Corona make for a long yet fascinating tale…

Cassandra: Bottom-line us, Beardy.

Shorty: I fell asleep in a food trunk.

Lance: Huh?! No, no, no, no, no! (rushing to the food locker) The food! He ate all the food! The bread! The cheese! Those little cocktail weenies 'n' the peppercorn jelly! Gone! All gone! Why? WHY?! You're a monster. (He sobs squeakily, running into Eugene's next speech.) Ee-heem-hmmm-heemmm…

Eugene (irritated): Well. I guess someone should head into town and pick up more supplies. Anyone up for a walk?

Rapunzel: Ummm … I'll go, if that's… okay.

Eugene: Sure! I mean, if you want to go… for a walk; you don't… need to feel pressured.

Rapunzel: No, no! I — I'll — I won't…

Eugene: But just to be clear, I didn't officially ask you to go… for a walk!

Rapunzel: Ohhhhkayyyy, but the question was still out there — doesn't that count?

Eugene: Depends. Are you officially asking me to come?

(All this maundering is beginning to tell visibly on the nerves of the others.)

Rapunzel: Would that change your answer?

Cassandra (sighing softly): Hhnn…

Eugene: I don't know — would it change yours?

Rapunzel: Aaaa question's a question…

Cassandra (sighing heavily): Huhnnn…

Rapunzel: …the answer should be the same either way…

Eugene: Yeah, now I'm confused, Rapunzel; do you want to go for a walk or not?

Rapunzel: … Do you wanna go for a walk?

Cassandra: UUUGGGGGHHHHHHH! GUYS, I CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE — ENOUGH! No-one's going for a walk! Let's just take the caravan into town — together.

Scene 7. On the caravan, moving into Vardaros.





Rapunzel: I don't understand. Pascal, how can Eugene be getting married? What if that's the last time we ever talked? Why didn't I say, "Yes"?

(sung) When I let him walk away,
What if I had spoke instead?
Why did I go on concealing
The confusion I was feeling?

Now I'll never get to say
All the things I should have said.
Now there's no more love, just echoes of
The life we should have led.

If I could take that moment back!
If he were here beside me still,
I'd let him see inside my heart.
Now he never will.

Eugene: Maybe if I gave her time…
Maybe if I didn't go,
Maybe things somehow would change, but now
I guess we'll never know.

Rapunzel: If I could take that moment back!

Eugene: If I could turn back time, I would!

Both: If we could make a brand new start…
How I wish we could!

Rapunzel: Wish I could take it back,
But now it's gone for good.

Eugene: Wish I had that moment back.



Adira: Look, I am a friend, and I am here to make sure you get to the end of this journey you're embarking on. Listen, I don't have all the answers, but now that I've seen all that I have, I have no doubt, these rocks were looking for you, and you must follow them … to the Dark Kingdom.

Eugene (sung): We're gonna walk down that path and over the rise.

Rapunzel: Guess we'll discover just where our destiny lies.

Eugene: Who cares how dark it'll be? 'Cause I've got you…

Rapunzel: You've got me…

Both: So let's go see where this whole thing's goin'!
Next stop, anywhere!

Rapunzel: And where I'm supposed to be, with you close to me.

Both: Next stop, anywhere!

Eugene: Facin' every jeopardy, linked insep'rably.

Both: Next stop, anywhere!

Rapunzel: Though it may get rough for us…

Eugene: We're enough for us.

Both: Next stop, anywhere!

Rapunzel: And the world is waitin'…

Eugene: I feel it waitin'…

Rapunzel: With new adventures to share,
Everywhere!

Eugene: Everywhere!

Both: Everywhere!

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